old fashioned mayonnaise

my grandma & grandpa, Phyllis & Kyran in Colombo

This recipe isn't from the ledger - it's a remembered one. I am feeling the urgent need to find out about more about Grandma (including the things I remembered that she cooked), while there are still people who remember. Already there isn't much I can find out about Bessie Pearl, and all I have is this little ledger of recipes to share with you. But Grandma, we still remember you well.  She died in 1995 at the pretty nice age of 84 - I always wanted her to live to 100, so she could have tea with the Queen (does that still even happen? Or, does she send a letter or something?), but Grandma was adamant she was already 'living on borrowed time' because your fair share in life was 'three-score and ten' (that's 70 if you didn't know). I guess that is pretty morbid! But, we got used to her saying it! 

I still miss her.

Grandma's are pretty awesome. Mine was a little odd - well, she was a worry-wart. In the EXTREME sense. So, a lot of our time spent with her was not exertious (is that a word?). We watched old movies (which I still love to do), coloured-in, went for walks. She fed us a lot! (What a hoarder!). She taught us 'Patience' (or Solitaire), and told us if we cheated in Patience, we were only cheating against ourselves. Then we would watch her cheat, and she would say when confronted, "It's OK, because I already know that I have lost". Hmmm, grown-ups! She taught us to crochet and knit (forgotten skills, alas), and she could open any stuck jar! She was fair. Sometimes mean and crotchety. A great believer in the clean underwear-incase-you-get-hit-by-a-car theory and a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. When we caught the bus to see our other Grandma (still here, love you Grandma!) she would instruct us to sit half-way back in the bus, on the driver's side. There was no mucking around on that one, - that was where you were safest on the bus! (I don't know the reasoning, something to do with the way a bus would roll..). She was always there for you. 

She used to make this mayonnaise. It was sweet and creamy and yellow, and she put it in these cute little jars. Mmm, I remember it well! I was desperate to find out how she made it, and asked Mum if she knew. "Oh yeah, Grandma's mayonnaise - she made that with sweetened condensed milk". What? How disgusting! Ew. But also, I guess I understood now why I probably liked it so much when I was little. I was kinda apprehensive to make it just because of the SCM, but also because I had no idea of the quantities of ingredients to use. I started out with just a little vinegar, and went from there. Really, it was disgusting. I think this recipe really is a taste thing, in-so-much as how much you use of everything. But, please, don't start with only one tablespoon of vinegar. It isn't gonna work. It is gross. It may have even ruined the whole thing for me, even though it tastes more like it should now. Please, please, start with one CUP of vinegar!!

Mum also told me that the jars Grandma used were old honey jars. I haven't seen any like them around, so I waited until our honey jar was empty so I could follow suit, even if it is just in spirit. Re-using old jars is easy, just clean them out well, then put your oven up high and put the jars on the rack, upside down, (so the hot air can get up through the bottom) for 20 minutes.  Put the jars in when you turn on the oven. Mum taught me all that. I think you can also boil them. I will try and find out more and let you know - there are some canning projects coming up!

This mayonnaise comes out really sweet, more like salad cream. It is yummy on sandwiches, on toast with eggs, hamburgers. Anything you would use mayonnaise or mustard on. 

Old-Fashioned Mayonnaise

1 tin Sweetened Condensed Milk

1 cup of white vinegar

1 tbspn mustard (I also added mustard seed)

salt & pepper to taste (I would start with a tbspn of each. It needs the salty to cut through the sweet).

~ whisk until creamy

~ refrigerate

of course, I have to make cute labels too!